I want to say hi. HI!
This past few weeks have taken a little of a toll on my emotions. My husband took a job in another state, I moved into my bosses house and have become her full-time nanny and assistant, I lost a fur-friend yesterday, and I am dealing with my already too busy life. I often feel like it will never end. It was yesterday when I was taking my fur-friend to the vet for her last hour with her body, that I realized or rather re-realized something that I often miss when the chaos blinds the soul, mind, and eyes the true beauty of life – to live. Not to make sure your alive by becoming a stunt master, adrenaline junkie. or an exhibitionist, (which is fun), but to just live in the very moment. I looked around and saw confusion, anger, lost souls, heartache, and a mass of people rushing to a destination. I took a deep breath and just soaked up the moment and it was some strange release. A sort of calm that I rarely feel. Life is here, it changes, it dies, and it lives. I am often not sure if what I have written makes the most sense, but as of now my brain is still processing loads of information from all that has happened. The most important thing I have to remember is to breath and just be exactly where I am – in this moment.
With all that said, I want to give a couple of tributes. A tribute of change.
The first change is to a new beginning in a place familiar, but uncertain. I hope the change is everything you could ask for, and I know that if this life is for us to be together in an infinite bond, it will work. The time away will be almost unbearable at times and I will wonder if it will be worth the agony in the end, but what is life without question, thrill, uncertainty, passion, and a little heartache. I love you. It is deep and almost unexplainable. I could dive deep into every book of words known, and still not find the words to express my feelings.
The second change is transformation. Believe what you will, and I will believe what I think to be true. My fur-friend, Daisy, met her time yesterday after 14 years of living. I held her every step of the way and laid with her after her soul drifted to another place. A place where she will most certainly become one of the bossiest humans the world will ever know. However, her heart will be kind, compassionate, and always giving. I knew her for four of her wonderful years and she became a huge part of my heart, a quality she will take with her as she effects everyone she is to met in the life she enveloped when she passed from her tired body. Be true Daisy, and I hope to meet you again. Perhaps, one day we will become the best of friends. And I will know that I must have known you in another time and another place.